The “wrong” bathroom??

One of my first concerns was relative to how hard it was for each of us to come out as gay 12+ years ago.  We have each been relatively lucky (besides the straight camp Katie’s parents sent her to…) and have encountered little push back from society in general.  We were denied a wedding cake once, got lectured in a King Soopers, and had the general run of awkward looks and such.  But coming out is never easy.  Now Katie has to do it again.

I get worried for the idea of trans people.  Reading things online about using the correct bathroom and very honest phrases like “if it’s safe”.  I don’t want her to face that!  The world isn’t as open to trans people now as it is to gays now, very much like it wasn’t open to gays those years ago when we each were coming out for the first time.

But we have to, and we will together.

I told her (yes yes, I know I am using the incorrect pronouns, but this will take time) about these concerns.  She looked at me and said … that already happens.  And it was like a light bulb.  It does!  She currently gets told several times a week that she is in the wrong bathroom.  Transitioning will fix that misconception.

And I can’t even imagine what it feels like when you identify as male, but are outwardly female … and you go into the female bathroom only to be told you are in the wrong one.  On the inside she (he) has to be screaming I KNOW … but in our current reality she has to correct them or ignore them.  And continue to use the bathroom that feels wrong, arguing that she is in the right one.

What a relief this will be when the change can be made.